Maybe cross the country

Thu, 09 Nov 2006 05:32:07 GMT

everyone please add

panic_baby its my new livejournal. i'm done with this one.

Tue, 24 Oct 2006 04:07:50 GMT

i deleted my myspace and it feels good.
:]

Mon, 23 Oct 2006 01:40:25 GMT

god, i'm so scared.
please let him be ok.

Sun, 08 Oct 2006 04:52:15 GMT

fourth place out of 30.
i'm so proud of myself.
i worked sooo hard for this.

This is what cody made me for my birthday. Its sooo amazing.
i love it. The FORMAT <33333

Mon, 04 Sep 2006 06:25:01 GMT

hahahahahaha

what? what? i love allison!

and our issues!

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 01:25:00 GMT

this is always how it is when school starts, isn't it?!
:[

oh well, i'm too happy to care right now.

Thu, 17 Aug 2006 02:15:29 GMT

Speech and Debate was the best thing i could have ever done.

:]

Fri, 11 Aug 2006 00:32:08 GMT

i hate it when i see your screen name online and you don't instant message me.
and i hate it even more when you do.

Thu, 10 Aug 2006 17:07:55 GMT

100 RANDOM facts about me.
(this might take a couple of days)
just because michelle did it. hahah.

1. I don't like people that make me laugh more than i make them laugh because i feel like i'm not doing my part.
2. I wish that i believed more and quetioned less.
3. I miss every person that has ever hurt me because i feel that i deserve to be let down.
4. I'm afraid that actual love is going to be a let down for me because i've made it into so much in my mind.
5. I wish that i was shorter.
6. I love to listen to one song on repeat for hours and it drives everyone crazy.
7. Random people make me really nervous.
8. Sometimes, i get really really emotional for no reason and start to cry at everything, but i don't let people know that i'm crying.
9. I never tell people when they hurt me; i think i have to be stronger than everyone expects me to be.
10. Lyrics mean more to me than anything anyone has ever said to me.
11. I like the lives of the people in my books that i write about, better than my own.
12. Sometimes i say i hate something just to get a reaction out of people.
13. I don't really want to become a writer, but only because i'm afraid that no one will like my books.
14. I worry about things that will never happen and i know that they will never happen, but i still worry.
15. Sometimes i would much rather it be quiet then have someone talking to me.
16. I wish that people thought i was creative.
17. I wish i was open with everyone but there are only four people that i am completely open with.
18. Pain scares me, but if i'm inflicting it on myself i feel relaxed.
19. I still like some people that i clame to hate.
20. I like the attention i get from walking on my toes.
21. I feel horrible when people forget my name or call me "kristin, kristy" because they can't remember the a at the end.
22. I don't think that anyone knows who i am if i only meet them once or twice.
23. I don't believe in hell.
24. If i could actually sing well, i would be so happy.
25. I hate that my eye sight is so off.
26. I wish that i thought i was pretty.
27. I bite the inside of my check when i'm thinking.
28. I worry that my favorite bands will break up.
29. I cry at the thought of failure.
30. I never liked the format, until i went to their concert and i was blown away.
31. I lie to alot of people because i don't like to talk about how i feel.
32. Hiding my feelings is completely normal to me.
33. I wish that I talked less and listened more.
34. Ice is my abosulte favorite thing to eat, no matter what.
35. I'm scared that i'll get lost in the high school crowd and no one will notice.
36. I don't miss New Mexico at all.
37. My most missed memories are summer '04 and 8th grade.
38. If it would rain more, i would be the happiest person alive.
39. I tend to like someone until i know that they like me and then i don't like them as much.
40. I tend to like people who i don't think that i could ever get, so the challenge is put there.
41. I envy a lot of people.
42. I find everyone's flaws.
43. I look for reasons to why someone is not perfect.
44. Change is something thats hard for me to deal with.
45. I'm afraid that i won't get into the college that i want to go to.
46. Walking places worries me because of all the crazy people out there.
47. i really love to work for no pay. i think its really rewarding.
48. On aim i leave certain things up or put certain things in my profile, hoping that the person that it is about reads them and feels bad.
49. I have so much fun making fun of alex.
50. If i was ryan's age, i wouldn't choose to hang out with any of his friends.
51. I think driving is very fun.
52. Being 16 scares me.
53. I own two pairs of flip-flops and one of them is the only thing i have worn this summer.
54. Having clothes in my closet makes me feel like i have a million choices to wear.
55. I love stuffed aniamls.
56. If i had to save one object while my house was on fire and my family and pets were already safe, i would take my stuff bear, Bobo.
57. I love watching Grounded For Life.
58. Watching the last episodes of shows makes me cry.
59. I hate endings, but i also hate beginnings.
60. i really like my hand writing.
61. As much as i fight with ryan, i care about him.
62. Dissapointment is something that occurs to me often.
63. When i look for clothes my first thought is: i hope this doesn't make me look fat, and my second thought is: is this cute.
64. I love shoes.
65. Photography is so fun and makes me feel accomplished.
66. Sometimes i compliment someone because i want them to like me, not because i actually think that.
67. I like being considered a leader.
68. I wish i was clever.
69. The new Hellogoodbye cd makes me hope that love is as amazing and they say it is.
70. I wish that i could spell.
71. I'm on aim alot, but i always have an away message up.
72. Summer means more to me then any fun i have during school.
73. I really want to fall in love with someone that i think is perfect.
74. I pick at people's mistakes.
75. I love slow songs. They calm me down.
76. Writing something is the best way for me to get my feelings out.
77. I really do like my hair color.
78. I'm glad that i don't have my mom's hair.
79. I wish my eyes were more green.
80. I really want to have a passion for something.
81. I love looking that the stars.
82. Dancing in the rain is one of my abosute favorite things to do.
83. My favorite number is 11.
84. I'm starting to really like make up.
85. Josh always picked at everything i did and it bothered me every day.
86. My favorite thing to do in summer, is so sit outside at night and just feel that i have no pressures.
87. I love wearing dresses.
88. I always feel awkward having to carry so much stuff on top of my binder.
89. I never use my cd player, its just easier to listen to things on my computer.
90. I love hair spray.
91. I wish i lived with marcella, sometimes. its never boring at her house.
92. Sometimes, i wish that i have more siblings, but if i did i think i would hate it.
93. I love buying bathing suits, but hate wearing them.
94. I love buttons.
95. Having to carry a purse annoys me.
96. Most things in my room are purple, but its not even my favorite color, anymore.
97. I also don't have a favorite color, i just don't like to pick.
98. Becoming older scares me.
99. I realized that i'll never have the present again, and that scares and upsets me.
100. I'm afraid that i'll get cancer because it runs in my family.

ok i have to go shopping. i'll be back later to do this.

people.

Tue, 08 Aug 2006 08:04:49 GMT

Write fifteen statements, intended for different people. Never tell which one is to who.
Write things you've always wanted to tell people.

1. You make me worry. You cause me so much stress, yet i think of you alot. I wonder about you and i hope that you are ok. I know that you probably don't care at all, but i still wish things were better. It doesn't matter if i don't talk to you very often you always mean something to me. its hard to explain how i feel towards you because i'm not even sure about it myself. I hope that one day you grow up and learn and i also hope that one day you call me up and want to see me, because i know that someday i'm going to want to see you.

2. I know you very well and sometimes i hate it more than anything. Its hard for me to look at you and wish i was so much more like you. Its hard for me to watch you grow while i feel like i'm sitting here staying the same. I feel that someday maybe you might leave me for something better and that thought hurts me because i feel that it could easily happen. I know that i hate you at times but only because i'm so jealous of everything you are. I wish that things were different and i didn't envy everything that you are but maybe thats what made me want to be so close with you. i don't know.

3. I don't think you like me very much right now and that worries me. I feel like i could be replaced with anyone that will give you the time of day. I know its so wrong, but having you as a friend makes me feel so much better about myself because you compliment me all the time and it makes me so happy to hear those things because i don't see them in myself. I'm sorry that being my friend brings you down, but it gives me a high of self esteem. i just hope you aren't upset with me.

4. SHUT THE HELL UP and stop being a pain in the butt. you are an ass and i hate you. grow up, loser because you are stupid.

5. When i'm with you i feel like i have to prove myself to you so much. If i'm not perfect, then you aren't happy with me and i hate that because i know you dont' really think that. It just feels like you do and i know you dont' judge me, but i always feel like i am being judged when i'm around you. I feel like if i was lost in the crowd in high school you could easily forget me and that hurts considing the fact that i think so much of you. i love you, i'm sorry that i'm not perfect.

6. I consider you so much in my life. I really think you are amazing but i'm afraid that you don't see me like that at all. i don't think you care about me as much as i care about you and i'm sorry that i'm not what you like in a friend. i don't think you miss me and when you see me, i don't think you care that much. i love you, i'm sorry that i'm not everything that you want me to be, but i can't help just being me.

7. I think you are perfect. I think that you have everything, i wish my family was more like yours and i wish that i was more like you. I wish that i could tell you everything and just completely open up to you, but i hold back because i don't know how you would see some of the things that i think. I wish you said how you feel about me and everyone more often because i like to know that. and i wish that you would stand up for yourself because i have never seen you do that and it hurts me to see you in so much pain when it could all be solved so easily.

8. I'm so sorry. Everything i put you through makes me feel like a completely horrible person. I don't know why i just couldn't be nice to you. i know this doesn't make up for anything i did to you, but i'm sorry that i made your life hell for stupid selfish reasons. and just because i didnt' want to be seen as a geek or something. i'm sorry that i think too much of what people think of me and that i had to be such a horrible person to you. i hope that someday you can forgive me, or even forget me because you should get so much better than a person like me.

9. You mean a lot to me and i know that i mean a lot to you but its hard for me to deal with all of the things that come with you. and its hard for me to deal with all of you problems because i really want to be there for you. i really really do, but its so hard. i only have so much advice and i only have so many things to tell you, i'm sorry that i can't always be there for you. i really care about you, i'm sorry.

10. You are honestly my best friend that i open up to no matter what the subject is.

11. you are my everything. i wish you knew me more and i wish that you were really more in my life. and i wish that we were the best of friends because i think that you could make me an amazing person because you are already one yourself.

12. i wish that you would actually come to visit me and i wish that you wouldn't put so many people in front of my on your list of friends because its hard to know that i'm towards the bottom of the list. i really do love you. you are basicaly the only person that i meet at stapley that i would still want to be friends with 50 years from now. i'm sorry that you don't feel the same about me. but i really wish we were even closer than we are.

13. i love you so much and i think that you could be such a better person but you won't let yourself grow. you need to learn so much about yourself but i don't think that you care enough to even give yourself the chance to learn. i promise you that i'm always here for you, even if you aren't willing to open up to me.

14. i really dislike you. i mean, honestly i don't like what kind of person you are, and i have heard that you hate me. but you told me recently that you don't hate me and i don't think i really believe you. i have a class with you this year and that is actually not fun for me. i hope that you change because i really think you should.

15. I miss you so much. i really really want to see you. but we always say 'oh lets hang out' or 'oh come sleepover' but we never actually do anything about it. i hate that. i was thinking about you today and i was wishing that we were close again. i miss everything about you and i wish that you would just call me up and ask me to spend the night because i would in a heart beat. but i'm afraid if i ask you, then you will say no and i would rather not see you, then know that you don't want to see me.

Fri, 04 Aug 2006 01:44:59 GMT

I realized today that my greatest fear is failure.

and the thought of it scares the hell out of me.

Sat, 22 Jul 2006 17:12:24 GMT

you could loose yourself in your courage.

Tue, 18 Jul 2006 07:50:26 GMT

mmm.... life is good.

Tue, 20 Jun 2006 06:01:59 GMT

I really want to meet someone with one face, instead of two.
Because i know so few people like that.

Mon, 12 Jun 2006 01:06:51 GMT

I have been thinking way too much.
and no one loves some girl that over thinks everything.

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 21:41:16 GMT

I have moved. panic_baby is my new livejournal. You can add it if you want. it is all goign to be friends only and i don't think i'm going to add any one. its kinda just for me. and only me.

i'm still deciding.

just so you all know.

Sun, 04 Sep 2005 05:31:15 GMT

This is what I've heard: A girl at Mountain View shot herself on Thursday night. Thats so sad. She was somewhere around my age. And doing drugs. Got caught at school with drugs. The officers walked her home. She took her brother's target gun and shot herself in the head. Her brother found her.

I tear up just thinking about it.

How could she do that to herself? To her family? To everyone that knew her?

This reminds me of the Lance Adams accident. Poor kid, but he died in a freak accident.

How can someone take a gun and say its over? I mean just, how can you make that desision?

Poor Ally. She took it really hard. i hope she's ok this weekend. She wasn't ok Friday.

R.I.P Bri.
R.I.P Lance.

I didn't even know this girl and it has affected me. Its crazy to think that her death has affected more people then she even knew. I wonder if she knew what she was doing when she said her last goodbye....

... i don't think she did.

so long and goodnight. i think that fits for this.

so take a long walk off of the shortest pier you can find...

Sat, 13 Aug 2005 06:27:09 GMT

So I basicly don't have any talent at drawing or being creative. So when i make something that I actually like it is suprising. And only happens about every 12309234 years... to be exact haha. Anyway I was in a really SoCo mood and all so i felt like drawing a picture or something like that anyway, this isn't very good. but I figured i would just show you guys anyway

If you can't read it the top part says "I've relied on you like yellow does on blue"
the middle part says "Lets get crazy
Talk about our big plans
Places that you're going
Places that I haven't been
Build your walls up
Concrete Castle
Keep this Kingdom
Free of hassle"
and the bottom says "Something Corporate, You're my good feeling... <3"
well hope you all like. it isn't much but i think it looks ok. :o)

And for those of you that like The Academy Is... (and if you don't you should) Well i made some random thing for my binder. It actually turned out looking pretty good i think.

It just has about a million different Academy is lyrics on it. And in the middle in darker pen it says "The Academy Is... Almost Here" And on one of the sides it says "*~TAI ~*"

Catch you on the flip side,
Krista

Sun, 31 Jul 2005 18:42:19 GMT

so, i got my schedule... finally. and allie and i have no classes together, but thats ok we can walk to alot of classes together and stuff.. And because this is my first schedule ever, and i flip out over little things like this... I color coded my map of the school!!!

ack i really can't wait for school to start!

Michelle's b-day is tomorrow, huh, i need to get her a present!!

its been a bad day

Sun, 24 Jul 2005 19:40:41 GMT

so i did a lot of crying last night. don't ask, it was just a bad day. anyway, so now my eyes are kinda puffy for the trip lol.

and my brother keeps grabbing my nose to hurt me, and so i'm breaking out on my nose. haha its actually pretty funny. Cuz i consider breaking out to be like one or two zits on my nose, and thats it. lol. see i usually don't break out at all, so one or two zits is like a huge deal to me. haha

anyway, i really do love the show That's So Raven. It is kinda immature and stuff, and i don't really find it that funny, but for some reason i love that show.. haha

well i need to go pack, so i will see you'll again on Wednesday. Wish me to have a good time, and please wish me good luck for all the rides, because i'm going to Magic Mountain... and i'm afraid of heights. haha.

love ya,
Krista

Even angels fall

Fri, 22 Jul 2005 21:50:15 GMT

So i'm usual me... but i really really want to get a new hair style just cuz i have always had the same hairstyle for like forever.. any ideas of cute cuts??

This Sunday i will be heading to California at around midnight and won't be returning until wednesday morning. it is actually going to be an awesome trip because no parents are going. A few adults are going of course, but like not anyone's parents that i know. and it is about two bus full of kids going. Including my brother and some of his friends. But i'm heading out with some of my best friends so that will be very, very fun. I really can't wait.

I love the movie Ten Things I Hate About You. I have watched it like ten times in the last 3 days.. its totally awesome.

So i'm outta here, but SOME people need to start becoming a myspace whore like i am haha. (michelle.. who hasn't been on myspace/aim in like 2 whole days!! haha)

Edit: Michelle is on.. haha

Oh california

Fri, 22 Jul 2005 04:46:39 GMT

OH i can't wait for the trip.. !!!!!! YEAH I CAN LIVE LIKE THIS!!! yes i think i can

i feel really good. i need to run tho cuz i haven't in a few days. i think i will run for a few hours tomorrow.

hmm not much of an entry but it just felt the need to talk about the trip!

this makes me want to be a kid again....

Sat, 18 Jun 2005 04:41:19 GMT

Remember when getting high meant swinging at the playground. The worst thing you could get from boys was cooties. Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were who ran the fastest. War was a card game. The only drug you knew of was couqh medicine, and wearing skirts didn't mean you were a slut. The only thing you smoked was the tires on your bike. The only thing that hurt was skinned knees, and the only things that could get broken were your toys. Life was simple and care free, but what I remember the most was wanting to grow up.

Fri, 13 May 2005 21:03:27 GMT

TONIGHT'S THE DANCE AND "MY MOVES WILL BE SO HOT YOU'LL HAVE TO STAND UNDER THE FAN"!!!!!!!

and we'll dance and dance and dance and dance and dance,
Krista

i have soo many problems.. lol

Thu, 12 May 2005 04:16:33 GMT

So i cut myself with an x-acto (sp?) knife today.. on my thumb. That hurt a lot. And then tonight I am shaving and I cut myself really badly. It has already bleed through 4 band-aids. I am really going to have to marry a guy who like sells band-aids.. lol never mind i've got a guy waiting for me *wink*

<33 Krista